What do you want written on your tombstone?
The contest between pleasure and virtue
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For the ancient Stoic Chrysippus the primary conflict in our lives was between the call of pleasure and virtue.
The philosopher statesman Cicero summarized:
Between virtue and pleasure: a contest of which Chrysippus, a man both shrewd and careful, does not think lightly, for he considers that the entire decision about the supreme good is involved in the opposition between these things.
For the Stoics, pleasure was a preferred indifferent. That means that they thought it was nice, but what really matters is how we pursue it.
When we step back, it’s easy to see that pleasure isn’t all that. Think of your favorite exemplars – are they blissed out? Perhaps it is just me, but I don’t imagine my heroes as living lives full of pleasure.
Talking about the Roman hero Calatinus, Cicero writes:
That is not the witness of the inscriptions on the tombs; this for example at the city gate: Many peoples agree that he was a leader of the nation beyond compare. Do we imagine that many peoples agreed concerning Calatinus that he was a leader of the nation, because he far excelled others in the production of pleasures?
In other words, someone isn’t a role model just because they know how to have a good time.
Tranquility, ataraxia, and pleasurable feelings are a wonderful thing. Our best memories often include them – but they also include something else: accomplishment, deepening of a relationship, growth. There needs to be something behind our feelings that connects us to the world outside our head.
But in the day to day, it can be easy to forget this. In every conversation and decision, we’re drawn to what feels good and averse to whatever feels bad. What’s one distraction, one step off of the path? It’s not a big deal. But life is made up of steps. Steps in the wrong direction, even if small ones, take us off course.
Before instinctively seeking pleasure – take the view from above. See your life as a whole and let the day to day trivialities fall away. Live in accord with your values – and have fun doing it.